Secret Valentines
by friedapetrenkoconut
Summary: The Valentine family have always considered themselves a private family. However when one relative shows up as Holby City Hospital on Work Experience, they leave fellow doctors wondering about how much they really know about the hospital's past, or the Valentines?
1. Chapter 1

Valentine's Day:

Jac Naylor rolled her eyes. Sitting in her email inbox was an email from the notorious Holby Sixth Form, begging once again to let a few of their students come to Holby City Hospital. Usually, Jac managed to make up excuses as to why she believed they shouldn't join her on Work Experience within Darwin Ward, and usually let Keller or AAU pick up the unwanted students, but this year Hanssen was being particular. Questions had been raised as to why Jac didn't want any students to work with her, so this year she had been reluctantly forced to offer at least one student a two-day placement.

Jac rolled her eyes as she flicked through the CVs of the five hopeful candidates. Some of them didn't have nowhere near good enough grades or extra-curricular passion for Medicine, so Jac immediately discarded them. Another applicant spelt her name as 'Jack' and that was simply idiotic. Therefore, Jac quickly found the student she would reluctantly try and persuade to do Medicine for the next two days. And much to Jac's annoyance, the application was flawless. The girl seemed to know all about Jac's research about stents, particularly her old Digby Stent Project, clearly, she had done her research. It appeared Jac had found her victim…

_A Hotel Somewhere in Holby…_

The sunlight cracked through the cheap curtains in the budget hotel Marina Valentine was staying in. She woke up, heart pounding and sweating- today was the day that Marina would get to work alongside other doctors at Holby City Hospital, including Jac Naylor. She had spent most of her life hearing about the hospital, her cousins Ollie and Penny Valentine were both doctors there and since she lived with the siblings during their time at Holby, Marina had heard many tales of what happened. She remembered hearing about Darwin's Connie Beauchamp (who now apparently was on the ED), Ollie's love-hate relationship with his mentor Greg Douglas, Penny and her affair with a patient, Linden Cullen's relationship problems and his subsequent death trying to protect his ex-girlfriend; and needless to mention, the sister turned doctor the Valentine household referred to as 'Freaky Frieda.' Marina had spent so much of hearing about the lives of doctors, she stupidly thought it fitting to join the profession herself, and even more fitting to try and spend as much of it at Holby as possible.

Her phone flashed up at the side of her bed, it was from Ollie, wishing her good luck and also offering her a tonne of plasters to help cover the verbal wounds that Jac would throw at her during her two days. Marina sniggered at Ollie's message, he had finally matured, him and his wife Zosia were expecting their first child together. Ollie had suggested they appoint Marina as Godmother, however Zosia was unsure. For some reason, Zosia had never really taken to Marina, she had always been rather distant and in some cases cold. Either way, Marina wished Penny could see Ollie now. Penny unfortunately died when a train roof collapsed on her whilst she was helping a patient at the scene of an accident. The loss devastated Marina for weeks since she was closer to Penny than Ollie, and she spent countless hours trying to understand that Penny was never coming back. If she was determined to make one thing go well today, it was to make Penny proud.

_Holby City Hospital_

"What's the rush for Jackie?" Kian Madani teased as Jac dashed past him, heading for the lifts.

"I have to go and collect a student… For work experience." Jac said, disgruntled.

Kian raised his eyebrows and looked delighted. He clearly had a lot of antics he could get up to with this student. He fantasised trying to get her to like his latest food creations (it was bought from the corner shop, but nobody needed to tell her that) and showing off to her whilst he performed his unique takes on surgeries. After all, it isn't called theatre for nothing. Kian grinned as he watched Jac storm into the lift, clearly someone was not as excited as he was…

The lift doors rattled open and Jac stormed into reception, looking frantically around for any sign of Marina. She could hear Carole Copeland happily chatting away to some visitor about her latest happy discoveries, and Jac heard the dreaded word 'dazzle' crop up a few times. With still no sign of Marina, Jac thought it best to shift the blame onto Carole instead.

"Carole," Jac barked, storming up to Jac's desk and pushing past the people in the queue. "You haven't come across a girl on work experience have you- oh… and sorry." Jac said, turning to apologise to the woman at the front of the queue who Carole was talking to.

The woman raised a small smile and brushed her bright pink hair out of her eyes. "No problem. Nice to meet you Ms Naylor, I'm Marina Valentine."

"Tada!" sang Carole excitedly, doing jazz hands in the process. "Also, did you know she's the cousin of Ollie Valentine who is married to Zosia. My dazzle always talks about Zosia, him and her are good friends. Did you know that once my dazzle and Zosia went-"

"Alright Carole," interrupted Jac. "I need to take Marina now."

Carole smiled politely but looked crestfallen that Jac did not want to listen to her stories about her son, Dom Copeland. Well, if no one else would listen to her, maybe the next visitor would be interested in Dom's childhood tales.

"Whose 'Dazzle?'" Asked Marina as they headed towards the lifts.

"Her son, Dom Copeland, you'd think that she would have stopped talking about him after he practically removed her from his life, but hey- what can you do when you're an annoying mother and your son is so self-centred that he thinks the only solution to his problems is cutting off his mother. "

"Funny you say that," Marina added coldly. "I did the exact same."

The journey to Darwin was unpleasant. Jac appeared to have hit a nerve. They walked into the main area of Darwin to be greeted with balloons and rapturous applause from all of Darwin staff. Kian grinned at the front, clearly this was his doing.

"Welcome!" Kian said, presenting his samosas to Marina. "Welcome to Darwin Ward."

Nicky McKendrick and Cameron Dunn grinned sheepishly the other side of Kian; clearly Jac wasn't impressed.

"Alright guys, party's over. It's work experience, not her birthday." Jac snapped. "Madani, Valentine, my office now!"

Marina couldn't help but notice Jac's office was uncomfortably hot, especially when the atmosphere was tense. It appeared that Jac was furious at Kian's idea of a welcome 'party,' and she kept furiously shouting that it was a ward and not a party venue. However, Kian didn't seem to mind, he rather seemed to enjoy the lecture. Finally, Jac was done with him, and he rose out of his chair looking thrilled.

"Again, my apologies Jackie. But if Marie over here wants any samosas, they are in the staffroom."

Kian laughed as he closed the door.

"It appears he has an annoying short form of your name alongside mine," Jac grimaced. "Marie? At least it isn't Jackie."

Marina nodded in agreement, she just wanted to leave Jac's office as quickly as possible.

"So, Madani has insisted you work with him today. He is doing some fascinating procedure that he refuses to tell me anything about, however I don't trust him, but if you are willing to trust him, I shall put you in his loving care."

Marina shrugged, "Sounds good. Let the farce begin."

"Valentine." Jac's tone softened as she said the name. "Please do Penny proud."

Marina nodded. "You know, Penny and I were very close, it has always been my aim to do her proud."

"I am sure you will Marina." Jac smiled for the first time as the door opened and in strode Adrian 'Fletch' Fletcher.

"Wow, is this Valentine Junior? Who also happens to be born on Valentine's day? Who in my opinion looks like she stole Frieda's wardrobe and spray painted it bright pink!"

Jac rolled her eyes at Fletch's comment whilst Marina laughed.

"I doubt Marina even knows who Frieda is." Jac snorted. "Saved her a lot of pain."

"Actually, I do. I probably know her better than any of you ever did."

Marina shut the door on a dumbfounded Jac and Fletch. The mention of Frieda and Penny had reminded her of something. If there was one thing she had to do before working with Kian, it had to be this. Marina darted into the nearest toilets and slammed the door of the closest cubicle. She rummaged in her bag and pulled out a baby pink diary, it belonged to Penny Valentine during her last year alive. Marina always read it whenever she needed motivation, and today was no different. Marina removed the bookmark from the latest page she had been reading, it was time to know more about Penny and make Penny proud by being as close to as good a doctor as she was.

_Nine years previously _

It was a bright but cold September morning. Penny Valentine wandered through the woods, rehearsing in her head a speech she was preparing for later on in the day. Truth was, Penny was in love. She thought she had passed the silly crushes she had during her time at school, however Penny had never crushed like it. Usually, it was some boy that played football at lunchtime, that in all honesty thought Penny was a massive nerd. However, a teenage Penny didn't care. This time however, Penny liked a girl. She didn't know how she developed feelings for her, but they were there alright. She couldn't get his woman out of her mind; she was the polar opposite to Penny: gothic and incredibly sarcastic; notorious for her permanent foul moods. But Penny for some reason loved her, and would do anything to be with her, even if it meant stalking her round the night shift. The birds sang overhead, did Frieda ever listen to birdsong, and mock it as it was like something from a perfect fairy tale film, where they all live happily ever after and usually perform some duet with a bird? Penny laughed to herself, only Frieda would think that. If she thought that. Was Frieda even capable of thinking? Probably she did, and Penny silently resolved to herself that she would try and find out as much about Frieda Petrenko during today's shift.

"Morning Penny." The familiar Ukranian accent that accompanied the strong body odour rose from behind Penny. Penny turned around excited and was met with Frieda staring at her from behind her dark eyeshadow, however her eyes glistened manically as she looked triumphant.

"Linden's having trouble with girlfriend," Frieda mocked, the corners of her mouth upturned in a cruel smile. "I want to be with you Faye, I love you. I do not mind that I am not father to baby, I really want to have- "

"Alright Frieda," Penny sighed, stopping Frieda as she was about to descend off onto a crude tangent. "Any patient updates."

"One man try punch Linden earlier. But he missed."

Penny rolled her eyes; Frieda was definitely in a difficult mood today. If Penny was going to ask her out, today may not be ideal. The entire AAU would know by the end of her shift that she was unsuccessful and Penny would never hear the end of it, especially from Ollie. Maybe today wouldn't be the right day. There were plenty of other days. And after all, how hard could dating Frieda be?

_Present Day_

"So…your cousin fancied Frieda," Nicky exclaimed during their lunchbreak. "I would have loved to have teased Frieda about that!"

Cameron nodded enthusiastically as they all tried to devour Kian's samosas. Cameron and Marina had been pranked by Kian that morning. Kian wanted to show them an elephant trunk and all the tricks he could do with it much to their disgust. On the bright side, Kian was positive and enjoyed their company.

"Didn't Frieda like Penny's brother Ollie more anyway.?" Nicky asked curiously. She met Marina's gaze and tried to correct herself. "Well that's what I heard from Zosia anyway."

"She liked Penny more," Marina corrected. "Definitely. Trust me, I witnessed it all. The love, the pain, the heartbreak…"

Nicky and Cam were hanging onto every word she was saying, she felt like a storyteller and they were some eager children on the front row. Marina pitied their excitement. They clearly had no idea of exactly what happened all them years ago. Everyone at Holby thought they knew the full story, but in reality… They couldn't be more wrong.

They had absolutely no idea what happened. Especially on Valentine's Day…


	2. Chapter 2

A train sped along the tracks heading from London to Holby. The windows rattled as the April rain pounded against the windows, and the air was cold. The day was miserable, as it had been for the past few days. The train passed through multiple fields, past rivers and small towns with people running to just get out of the rain. No one on the train showed any interest, there were a few men reading newspapers; screaming babies being comforted by their families, excited children running through the carriages all whilst the rain got heavier. Suddenly, the breaks screeched, people screamed as they were knocked out of their seats; the front of the carriage gave way; the lights were extinguished and- silence.

_A Hotel Somewhere in Holby_

Dripping in sweat, Marina woke up shaking. The same, recurring nightmare had crept its way into her dreams once again, but this time… it was worse. Never before had she seen the faces of the people within the carriage, and they were eerily familiar. Fumbling for her phone, Marina decided to ring Ollie, he would probably be able to advise her on why the nightmares were becoming more vivid.

"Ollie, I need to speak to you, it's about the nightmares, they're getting worse."

"Worse how?"

"I saw the faces, of the people. How long is it going to be, until I see her die in the dream? How long Ollie?"

"I don't know," Ollie muttered. "But maybe this wasn't a good idea. Clearly being at Holby is bringing back memories of Penny that you have fought so hard to try and control. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Ollie hung up. He had chickened out of a messy situation, yet again. But he had an element of truth to what he had been saying, perhaps a place like Holby wasn't the best place to go to try and deal with the loss of Penny Valentine.

_AAU_

Xavier Duval rolled his eyes. He was having relationship problems with Donna, and she appeared to be cold shouldering him. This shift was clearly going to be difficult for him, especially with the dead weight student on work experience shadowing him. Reluctantly, he had taken a rather cheerful phone call from Jac Naylor, who was convinced that the student wouldn't be so enthused about medicine after a day in the AAU. In the words of Jac, "she loved her day on Darwin, and I don't like that." So, Zav was stuck with her all day, and whilst trying to win back Donna, maybe he could try and convince the student to help him with his multiple plans.

"Mr Duval?" The sparkly silver eye makeup and lipstick alongside the bright pink hair was a sight for Zav, she didn't look quite as easy to manipulate as he first thought.

"Miss Valentine," Zav grinned sheepishly. "Welcome."

Marina nodded in acknowledgement; the AAU was a place she really wanted to visit. Penny had spent her last days working on this unit, as part of 'Team Spence' and it seemed the right place for Marina to spend her final day of work experience. Zav's first patient was a young woman, who had apparently fell down the stairs. Her right leg was evidently fractured, with the bone protruding from the skin, and she appeared to have severe bruising to her left leg. Zav promised Marina they would be able to look at the CT scans together, so she could try and work out where the fracture in the leg was, and any other potential injuries.

"There is evidently an open fracture of the tibia. As given by the bone fragments sticking from the skin, alongside symptoms such as the shortening of the right leg compared to left, alongside the bruising and swelling. This is a concern due to the risk of infection this type of fracture has. And, I may be wrong, but the CT appears to show that there is comminuted fracture of the fibula…" Marina looked nervously at Zav for his opinion.

He simply nodded, "Alright Dr Valentine, where did you learn all of this from?"

Marina laughed at him, he seemed alright, and a lot less scary than Jac. Zav looked nervously over to the other side of the room, where Donna was standing chatting to some other nurses.

"Anyway, better get theatre prepped, if you want to observe that is?"

"Sure," grinned Marina, "I'd like that."

Zav sheepishly turned to look at Donna, but she was still ignoring him. He had messed up big time, but why was she being so inconsiderate of his choices? His parents were his major priority that week, surely, she would have understood that, but apparently not. Clearly, she would have to take some winning over, she was definitely the most difficult woman to win over that he had dated. Maybe, he would ask Marina, she seemed as though she wasn't hostile towards him like most young adults were, perhaps she had some good advice to give him.

"Marina, I was wondering whether you had any good knowledge in the relationship crisis department?"

"Depends on what type of relationship you mean."

"Well, you see I had a bit of a family incident last week. My parents had both been admitted to hospital, I needed to look after them, and well I may have cut Donna off for a week. And now she's mad, she cried and everything. But why, I just didn't reply to her texts. No big deal, right?"

Nervously, Zav waited for a response from Marina, as she tapped her pen on her desk and tried to make it look like she was thinking hard. Zav had acted in the best intentions of his parents, but it was evident he hadn't considered the consequences that lack of communication has on people.

"Well Mr Duval, I will be honest with you. You were right to look after your parents. However, I have little experience of parents in that matter, but from what my friends have told me, it's what you do. You care for family, "she hastened as Zav looked triumphant. "But you should have never cut off Donna like that. It's scary. You get all these fears in your mind. Have I done something? Do they mock me? Do they love me? Donna definitely has right to be upset about it. And before you demand a second opinion, trust me, I have been ignored like that before and it's awful."

Clutching onto the desk for support, Marina looked up to observe the AAU department. She felt certain that she may have said too much to Zav, the last thing she wanted was him to start counselling her family problems. Perhaps he'd gossip about her to other doctor members, the doctor with the auburn hair in the corner looked like she would happily gossip with him about the stupid work experience student and her family problems. Or perhaps she was just overreacting. But as Marina stared out into AAU, she noticed the woman she saw earlier walking towards her. That woman was familiar.

"Penny?"

_Nine years previously_

"Penny?" Frieda was curious as the English beauty walked towards her, looking triumphant.

"Patient with the mysterious illness has received a diagnosis!" Penny grinned and rested on the desk. "Feels good to successfully treat new diseases."

Frieda nodded and continued flicking through the patient notes she was looking at. As annoying as Penny was, Frieda was secretly crushing on her, and it irritated her greatly. Why was she in love with the hospital's most infuriatingly nosy doctor?

"So you are extremely sure you don't want to train to be a doctor?" Penny flirted, waving some forms in Frieda's face.

Yes, definitely nosy.

"No," Frieda yelled. The whole of AAU turned and looked at her. Frieda glared at them all and stormed off. She had messed up once again. There was not a chance that Penny reciprocated feelings back for her, she was clearly fighting a losing battle. Angrily kicking the vending machine, Frieda knocked loose a chocolate bar, which she angrily picked out of the machine and turned around to face Penny.

"Frieda I am so sorry," Penny panted, clearly upset. "I just want what's best for you."

Frieda's heart fluttered. Not many people ever said that. Maybe Penny did feel the same. But Frieda was probably just fantasising, no one she ever fancied liked her back, such as Ollie. Frieda realised she was still staring at Penny, and nervously diverted her eyes down to the floor. She had seen correctly, there definitely was some sort of compassion in Penny's eyes. Maybe she did like her back.

"I know," Frieda began, kicking some dust on the floor and still avoiding eye contact. "Thanks. Want to meet for drink after work, I want to say thanks for some reason."

Frieda raised her head to look Penny in the eye and met Penny's blushing face.

"Of course, Frieda."

Smirking, Frieda turned on her heel and turned to head back to the AAU. Meeting Penny Valentine after a shift? Try telling Frieda that a few months back.

_Present Day_

"Penny who?" Zav was confused.

"What?" Marina snapped back to her senses.

"Penny. You were talking about how it was bad to cut Donna off, mentioned how you had been ignored before and then cried out the name Penny. It was like you had seen a ghost. Did she do something to you?"

"No, it's not that," Marina sighed. "Can we just get to theatre, please?"

But as Zav walked away, Marina realised she was scared. She could have sworn she saw Penny.

_Theatre_

Donna Jackson glared at Zav. He still hadn't apologised to her, and was showing no remorse for his actions. As she prepped the equipment, she distractedly muttered to Marina the procedure they were carrying out and why. Marina seemed to understand every word, but kept flicking nervous glances between Donna and Zav. There was a minor complication in surgery, in which the patient's blood pressure dropped too low, and Marina was ordered to the side. But the team of staff scrambled together to correct the complication, and Marina admired them for it. Penny probably performed procedures like this in the same theatre regularly.

"That was amazing," she praised Zav whilst they were washing their hands. "Now go and be amazing and try and apologise to Donna. I know you are sorry for what you did. And it's in your best intentions."

Zav turned and looked at Marina, and met her gaze before nodding and practically running out of theatre. Marina did not chase after him, she accompanied the patient back to AAU. There was something that had been annoying her. She just couldn't understand how a fall down the stairs could result in a fracture that bad. Her study of Physics suggested that the fall couldn't in theory gain enough momentum for the woman's leg to fracture. Nothing was impossible, but it didn't make sense.

"How did the surgery go?" The woman croaked from behind Marina's back.

"Fine," Marina nodded, but refused to turn around as she had just spotted sight of Jac Naylor walking towards her.

"How's it going?" Jac asked, her eyes glinting. "Struggling"

"Quite the contrary. In fact- "

"Spider!" Screamed the patient, cowering in fear.

"Where?" Asked Jac abruptly, "I don't see one."

"There is a huge, black and hairy spider on that girl's back," cried the patient, pointing a trembling finger at Marina's back.

"There isn't," Jac said, confused at the patient's hallucination. "I'm going to call psych team," she whispered in Marina's ear.

Marina turned confused, and grabbed the patient's medical notes and flicked through.

"What are you doing?" Hissed Jac angrily, snatching the file away from Marina.

But Marina had seen what she wanted to see.

"Miss Smith, it says in your medical files that you have macular degeneration, you are aware of this?"

The patient nodded timidly. "My eyesight is extremely poor, yes."

Jac looked furiously at Marina, what was she trying to achieve?

"Don't call psych Jac, I think it might be Charles Bonnet syndrome."

Jac stared at Marina. "Why? I have only heard of it being very rare. I myself have little knowledge of it."

"It's something to do with patients who have macular degeneration. I believe they can receive vivid hallucinations that make them believe something is actually there when it isn't."

Marina handed her phone to Jac. "Look!"

Jac silently read the facts. Marina may be right. A cold wave swept over her. How did she know this?

"What did you see before you fell down the stairs Miss Smith," Marina asked the patient.

"There was a walkway. A platform. I am sure of it. And then I stepped onto it, and it was gone. Why did it go?"

Locking eyes with Marina, Jac nodded. It appeared Marina may be right. Sighing with relief, Marina gave the patient's hand a reassuring squeeze. At least they had worked out why the patient's fracture was so bad. Zav had just entered the ward, and Marina tried to catch his attention. But he was disinterested, and got down on one knee in order to propose to Donna. Marina wasn't sure this was the right idea for Zav to reconcile their relationship, and as Donna furiously took him outside. Marina felt embarrassed that Zav had just been rejected. At least she wouldn't see him again.

"Valentine, my office now." Jac hissed angrily.

_Jac's Office: Darwin Ward_

"So first you flick through a patient's files, then you diagnose them without consent and then you diagnose them correctly?" Jac screamed. She was furious, mainly due to the latter one. An 18 year- old had beat her to a diagnosis. "What I want to know is why? Why do you know this much?"

Marina shrugged her shoulders. "Well living with the Valentines meant you heard it all really. I could probably tell you every procedure."

"You're lying." Jac said. "And I know you will refuse to tell me the truth. However, as angry as I am. I am impressed. If you want, we could make this position a permanent weekly work experience position if you want it?"

Nodding, Marina smiled at Jac. "I'd like that Jac. I'm sorry that I am lying to you, I just don't think you are ready to hear the truth off me. Not just yet, it's not dodgy or anything. It'll just result in me breaking some promises with some people."

A tear shed down Marina's cheek as she turned to leave Jac's office.

And as Marina walked out, for the first time, Jac noticed the limp Marina had.


	3. Chapter 3

"A drink, with Jac Naylor?" Spat Cameron bitterly after he learnt about Nicky and Marina's eventful night.

"Yep, a drink, for only the brightest and the best," teased Nicky, her face bright with excitement, "Plus, it was more than one drink!"

Cam watched on enviously as Marina and Nicky giggled like schoolgirls over having a few drinks with Jac Naylor.

"She was so funny as well, she was proper annoyed we had done some talented work the past week, but she was also rather… nice. I never thought I'd say that about her." Nicky grinned at Cameron as he turned away sadly.

Throughout his entire medical career, he had always wanted to step outside of his mum Bernie's shadow, but he felt as though he could never achieve this. He should have felt happy for Nicky, and perhaps he did, for her excelling within her career however he also was jealous for some reason he couldn't pinpoint. Maybe Nicky wasn't the problem, it was Marina, she was intelligent far beyond her years, and incredibly friendly; but most to Cam's irritation, she could probably do a better job at diagnosing patients than he could considering that he was meant to be the doctor. After finding out about Marina's extended placement, him and Nicky were both shocked when one night she invited them to a shabby little hotel room she was staying in. So, they made a deal, she could come and live with them providing that she didn't mind if she slept on the sofa. She initially refused, since she was unemployed, yet with Cam, Nicky and Chloe's help she managed to find herself a small part time job and could now start contributing towards rent. It was convenient for everyone; they could split the rent even smaller now since there was five of them.

"You really must be ill," mocked Chloe, waltzing into the kitchen alongside her boyfriend Evan. "Jac Naylor… nice?"

Nicky and Marina cackled with delight whilst Evan stood alongside them, looking agitated.

"Be careful," he whispered menacingly at them both. "People like her could always change, or she is just putting it on for her gain."

Evan was manipulative and miserable. He had his girlfriend Chloe hanging onto every word he said, and knew he could plant seeds of doubt into her mind, he seemed to have also gained Nicky and Marina's trust, but not Cam. But Cam would be dealt with shortly, it was evident that he was extremely fragile in Evan's eyes.

All five of them walked to Holby City Hospital that morning, since it was a sunny morning preceding a most probably sweltering day; they all hoped the air conditioning was working.

"I still cannot believe how lovely Jac was." Nicky rambled, trying to make conversation.

"Nicky, do you secretly love her or something?" Marina snorted, making a mental note it was the tenth time this morning Nicky had mentioned it.

Chloe burst out laughing, whilst Nicky looked sheepish. Cam and Evan were both too busy in bad moods to offer a reaction.

"No," Nicky stammered, trying hard to phrase her next words carefully. "I just admire her. A lot, for her brains and her… well- short tone. Why do you think I love her?"

"Oh nothing, just a family member of mine once went out for a drink with a colleague. She wouldn't shut up about it for days on end, next thing I knew, they were together." Marina shot a sly grin at Nicky. "But yeah sure. You admire Jac on a professional level, just like Cam."

_Nine Years Previously: Albie's Bar_

The music pounded in Frieda's ears as she squinted through the dark setting of Albie's trying to spot Penny. She noticed her mouth was horribly dry, she could hear her heart pounding and the palms of her hands had turned clammy. A man moved out of the way, and Frieda could distinguish the bright red hair. Penny was sitting at a couch alone in the middle, drinking a white wine. Frieda took a deep breath, she was being pathetic, after all Penny was just a friend, so it shouldn't be a big deal. As she walked elegantly in her heels over, she felt many other people in the bar staring at her; after all she rarely went there, and the sight of a goth like her might have been a sight for many people.

"Penny," she hoped that her voice didn't sound as wobbly as she just thought it did.

"Frieda," Penny smiled sweetly, curling her red hair between her fingers. "I had absolutely no idea what drink to order you."

Frieda blushed and smiled back, she rarely smiled and suddenly realised she wasn't being her usual cold self.

"I'll get vodka," she croaked, refusing to take her eyes of Penny. "But your version of vodka is pathetic."

Once Frieda returned, they both talked for hours. About more personal matters such as family and friends, and their experiences in medical school. Penny got increasingly more flushed with every vodka shot she did; Frieda had ordered a massive bottle and was determined that they both finished. It was clear Frieda was out of her shell, and was talking more at ease. Jac and Sacha had also come to the bar after work, and much to Jac's annoyance Sacha couldn't stop voicing his delight.

"I didn't realise Frieda could talk so much," he bumbled, his eyes twinkling, "a bit like you Jac. You hardly ever talk and it's usually similar. You are the Frieda and I am the Penny in this situation. To get the Friedas and Jacs of the world to speak is an achievement."

Jac sighed exasperated, "do you ever stop talking happy nonsense?"

The evening continued. Sacha tried to enjoy them, drunkenly excited to hear Frieda speaking more than a few sentences, but was met by the ice-cold death stare of both Frieda and Jac, so he trudged out of the bar defeated.

"You know Frieda," Penny slurred tipsily. "I like you as a person and I never thought I'd say that."

Frieda sniggered, clearly Penny was more of a lightweight than she was. "Well I don't hate you anymore. "

Trying to drunkenly act chivalrous, Penny offered Frieda her arm as they left the bar together. The night air was cold and the street lamps outside flickered.

"How romantic," sighed Penny, giggling as she did so.

Frieda's heart skipped a beat, "what?"

"Couples do this in the romances I watch," Penny rambled, staring Frieda excitedly in the eyes.

"Your point is…"

"I love you," Penny giggled, trying to drunkenly hug Frieda.

"Penny, you've had too much to drink. I take you home now."

Frieda pulled Penny off her, and tried to steady her. They were both extremely drunk.

"But Penny," Frieda breathed, her breath trailing out into the night air. "I guess I love you."

Before they could stop themselves, they both leant in for a kiss.

_Present Day: Reception_

Down at reception, Carole Copeland was accidentally crafting a massive queue as she tried to flirt with and give Hanssen a new pass for the hospital. Hanssen looked irritated as the chirpy woman rambled on about her marriage breakdown, and how she loved dancing. Marina rolled her eyes as she stood at the back of the long queue; she too had to be issued a new pass from the hospital, although she was distinctly aware, she was running very late for her stint on Darwin

"Who even thought making that woman receptionist was a good idea?" a cold voice scoffed from behind. It was Jac, looking ill and tired, her red hair tied into a messy bun. Casually, she sipped on her coffee as though she didn't mind the long queue.

"Most of the hospital is on standby. There's been a train collision nearby."

"A what?" Marina suddenly felt very numb. "No, not again."

The noises of the hospital seemed to fade and instead were replaced by the rattling sound of a train moving along the tracks, again the brakes screeched and there was a deafening thud and then silence.

Marina realised she was clinging violently onto Jac's arm, and loosened her grip a little.

"Sorry," muttered Marina. "I didn't mean to do that."

They stood in silence for the ten minutes that passed as the queue edged slowly forward. Carole was incredibly slow and irritating at wanted to gossip with every customer.

"Ooh if it isn't the scary Jac Naylor," she whispered excitedly. "And the medical prodigy that is… I can't actually remember your name sorry."

Jac huffed and looked exasperatedly around. "Any time today would be great Mrs Copeland."

Carole nodded timidly and went about her business. About a minute later, she proudly presented Marina with the pass.

"Really brings out your hair colour," she squawked.

Carole enthusiastically waved goodbye as Jac marched towards the lifts, looking more pained than what she did earlier, and Marina followed suit.

By the time they reached Darwin, they were both twenty minutes late, and Kian looked delighted as he scolded them (particularly Jac) on their punctuality. Jac rolled her eyes for the tenth time that morning and steered Marina into her office.

"So, are you going to explain to me what is actually going on?"

Jac rested her chin on her knuckles, and looked surprisingly gentle, but the fire behind her eyes implied that she was desperate for answers.

"I mentioned trains and you looked as if you had seen a ghost." Jac continued casually. "I also have noticed you have a slight limp, almost not noticeable but as a doctor- I notice these things."

A deafening silence followed and seemed to last forever.

"Well," Marina stumbled on her words as she tried to formulate a sentence.

"I don't really know how to tell you this, but I will try. I don't know whether or not you remember that train crash that happened nearby eight years ago, in which some of you went out to the scene, the one that Penny died in. If you really want to know, I had been in another town visiting a relative, I know small kid travelling on a train on her own, not the best move. Obviously, the train crashed and I got trapped under a table in the carriage as we were near the front. Naturally, Penny knew that I was most likely on that train somewhere and she acted casual upon hearing the news, for some reason I was at that point still the 'secret Valentine,' but anyway when she found me and the other survivor on my carriage, an elderly lady, the lady insisted to Penny that she should try and save me first. Penny insisted that I was to be treated outside, and when we were outside, she noticed the person trapped under the carriage and Penny being- well Penny decided that she'd try and save the patient. I don't need to tell you what happened next, I heard and saw it all, the death I mean. Maybe if she hadn't had saved me first, she might have survived. But I guess I'll never know. Oh, and the leg, I broke it, in several places, and it's just resulted in a limp."

The silence that followed was unwelcome, and on a rare occasion, Jac had tears in her eyes that were threatening to overspill.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't realise it was like that."

Not many revelations had influenced Jac in her lifetime, and she rarely felt sympathetic towards people, yet for some reason she did. On the rare occasion, she found herself attempting to call Michael Spence.

"Jac, this better be damn good."

There it was, the jeering voice that nine times out of ten Jac despised hearing.

"The death of Penny Valentine, I have her cousin working with me at the moment. I never realised she died in front of her cousin. I don't know why I'm telling you this, I'm just sceptical to believe it." 

"Cousin?" Michael laughed coldly. "The only relative of girl Valentine present on that day was her daughter."


	4. Chapter 4

"Daughter?" Jac was dumbfounded, surely, she'd heard Michael wrong, but he was adamant that he was correct.

"Trust me Jac," he laughed, clearly enjoying being ahead of her for once, "I speak the truth."

And with that. Michael changed the topic, and they discussed the old days, and certain relationships with colleagues such as Antoine Malick and Greg Douglas, they both reminisced about the overenthusiastic Elizabeth Tait, and how they missed the hospital before an initially cold Hanssen appeared. They ended the conversation on good terms, but Michael's words were still ringing in Jac's head. Daughter? The timeline added up almost horribly. If Penny died at 27, but had a daughter at 17, then her daughter could already be 18 years old. It worked, and Jac felt sick at the thought; all these years at Holby and not once did she know. Was it because she had very few friends, but Sacha would have told her eventually, unless he didn't know either?

"What's the long face for Miss Naylor," Fletch grinned round the edge of Jac's office door, he seemed far too happy.

"Nothing," sulked Jac, refusing Fletch's offer of a strawberry donut.

"Well it must be something" Fletch mocked, sauntering into the room. "You look like you've just found out someone's lied to you for years."

"Yes, exactly that," Jac snapped, her eyes glowing red at Fletch. "Taken me this long to realise that Marina is actually Penny's daughter."

Fletch snorted out some donut he was eating, and sprayed a bemused Jac with half chewed segments of it. "What as in Ollie's sister's daughter? No."

He continued chewing, and raised his eyebrows at the realisation that it was probably true.

"Therefore, you are mad as you haven't seen it all, and you're mad no one told you," Fletch speculated.

They locked eyes for a moment, Fletch's eyes glinting with amusement.

"Look Jac, if she wants to tell you, she'll tell you. Don't get mad because she chose to keep her family life out of the workplace, it's what you do best."

Cackling, Fletch shut the door, thrilled he had one over 'Jacula,' and grinning, he took another bite of the strawberry donut. At least the lies had come to the surface, and it wouldn't really affect him in the slightest…

_A Few Weeks Later: Albie's_

"The middle name is Dominic," screamed Dom with excitement across the table, making Lofty's glass of orange juice resonate. "Like that's so adorable."

"She couldn't really not name it after you," Marina added, causing a tipsy Dom to go even redder in the face and grow even more excited.

"At least somebody loves me," he happily sang, whilst trying to hug Lofty.

Essie and Marina both snorted at the drunken performance that was unfolding in front of them.

"So, how is your nephew? He's clearly made an impression on Dom," Essie smiled.

"Good, he's healthy and that's all that really matters. It was the right thing to do, call him Arthur. Both Ollie and Zosia have lost many people close to them, and I think to honour Arthur in that way was the icing on the cake for Zosia. Hopefully if they had a girl, it'd be called Tara Persephone or something similar."

Essie nodded sympathetically, and laughed as she was nearly knocked off her seat by Dom enthusiastically singing his rendition of Shakira's 'Hips Don't Lie." As Dom enthusiastically swung round, he knocked into Jac, who had been disapprovingly observing the table from standing distance.

"Jac," Marina called out, "Haven't seen you in ages, I've been stuck on Keller ward for weeks with this bunch. How's it going?"

"Good," Jac acknowledged, sliding along the sofa seat next to Marina. "Madani is now head of Darwin. I get to spend more time with Emma. That's particularly important you know, getting in that quality mother daughter time, never know when it's too late. Like, when the mother dies unexpectedly."

The tone of Jac's voice had changed suddenly, it sounded ominous, clearly, she knew. Marina's hand gripped the glass of cider she was drinking tightly and it shook, she prayed that nobody else had noticed. Essie was looking way, either by accident or incidentally not wanting to get involved.

"Bit grim Jac," Marina grimaced, trying to make her voice sound calm and composed.

"Hits horribly close to home doesn't it?"

"Does it?" Marina queried.

"You know, the thing I'd hate the most is for Emma to watch me die. For example, under a train trying to save a patient. That'd be tragic…"

She knew.

"I really hoped you'd changed; you know that don't you? I really thought you weren't as heartless anymore, but I guess I was wrong." Marina hissed so only Jac could hear. "You haven't changed a bit since I spoke to you when I was younger."

"I spoke to you years ago? When, how?"

_October 2010_

It was the night after Frieda and Penny had first met, and both staggered into work, hungover. However, Frieda seemed to be handling it better from previous experiences. They both crossed in the corridor and exchanged nervous smiles at each other, Penny's heart fluttered, she was crushing really badly. She buzzed into the AAU, and met an increasingly disturbed Linden Cullen. It seemed his time off had made him delve deeper into his faith, he smiled kindly at Penny and handed her some medical case.

"Where's Frieda," Linden asked, his accent heavy.

"Coming," Penny blushed, avoiding meeting Linden's eyes.

Her brother Ollie leant at the desk nearby, and she heard him cough shiftily, had she been that obvious.

"So sorry that I'm late," the drawling voice of Frieda Petrenko echoed around AAU. Penny was very surprised that nobody noticed her squeak of excitement, she was still very much in love. Frieda approached Penny and Linden. "How am I needed?"

"Punctuality Petrenko," sighed Linden rolling his eyes and storming off to a patient.

"Cheerful," Frieda commented.

"It's Mr Cullen," Penny added, her heart racing. "Look Frieda, we need to mention last night."

"That is was mistake," Frieda asked, sounding almost sad.

"Yes, no," Penny corrected herself as she stammered. "I meant it."

"So did I."

"Well," said Penny, "what now?"

"We lie and have fun," Frieda added smirking. "I pretend I don't like you in front of others and see how long it takes."

_Keller Ward October 2010_

"That looks boring." Sacha Levy heard a small voice behind him as he filled out some paperwork. Turning around, he was met by a girl of about nine years age.

"Hello," Sacha grinned friendly. "Are you here to see a patient?"

"No," the girl grimaced. "I'm here because I'm bored. I got shoved in the creche today like I was a nursery kid. My mum works here and she couldn't do much else so begged the creche, but all the kids do is be sick and inhale their own farts. I'm far too big for that." She stood defiantly next to Sacha.

"So, you've gone running around the hospital where it is dangerous and you could quite frankly, die." A cold voice spat. It belonged to a younger Jac, and she leant jeeringly over the small girl. "Go back to the creche."

"No," Sacha's smile fell, "if she wants to stay here, she can. Tell me, what's your name?"

"Marina."

"Do you know what a doctor is," Sacha asked kindly.

"Yes, I want to be one." The girl replied. "I know how to do some medical procedures. I could probably relocate your shoulder if it ever dislocated. I know a bit actually."

"Wow," acted Sacha. "Come on Jac, we have to keep her here. I wouldn't want Daniel getting bored in the creche at that age."

"Fine," Jac sighed. "But keep out of my way."

_AAU: October 2010_

If she had been asked this question a few months previously, Frieda would have screamed with joy (a rare occasion.) But her interests had switched from boy valentine to girl valentine, yet here he was asking her out for a drink, maybe a date, maybe not. She schemed to Penny that she was going to accept, and that eventually Penny would have to persuade ollie to cancel. However, this plan put Frieda in a good mood for the morning. Despite starting a relationship with Penny, she was still fairly moody, yet even the rare ray of sunshine she was displaying now was a surprise for Penny. Penny decided to brave the question she had longed to ask Frieda, whether or not she'd consider retraining as a doctor, and to her surprise, good mood Frieda accepted the offer. Contrary to popular belief rom other colleagues, Frieda remained in a good mood for the rest of the day, pretending to be disheartened when Ollie later on cancelled. However, she told a confused Penny that she didn't want to train as a doctor anymore, and that she was going back to the nightshift to avoid embarrassing work encounters.

"Frieda's really quite a sort," Ollie commented sullenly. "Is she ever pleased?"

"On the rare occasion," Penny sighed. "But not right now."

_Keller Ward: October 2010_

"See, you can try out my stethoscope," Sacha passed it over to Marina. "It lets me listen to heartbeats on it. It's pretty cool don't you think."

Nodding enthusiastically, Marina trailed after Sacha across the ward to where a patient lay in bed.

"Right Miss Fielding," Sacha exclaimed, rubbing his hands together with anticipation. "This is Dr Marina, and she's going to use her stethoscope on you."  
"No she isn't" Jac hissed furiously from behind Sacha, and pulled Marina violently to the side.

"You're a silly little girl who knows nothing. Do not ever play with stethoscopes like that again. Take her back to the creche Sacha, I can't believe you let her."

"It was my idea," cried Sacha defensively. "Why can you not accept a bit of fun?"

"Because it's a job Sacha, not a hobby. If that's what you think it is, I'd quit while you're ahead."

Jac stormed off, leaving a dumbfounded Sacha to pick up the pieces of the mess he'd created. He turned to talk to Marina, but she'd vanished.

_Albie's Present Day_

"So I was a little bit cruel to you, no big deal?" Jac spat at Marina.

"Well it's stuck with me ever since…"

"Yes and, I'm okay now right. And I have the right to not be that accepting towards you, you lied to me."

"Yes, but it wasn't my choice," mocked Marina, unphased by Jac's threatening nature. "So I haven't lied."

"But why do you keep lying?"

"Because I'm Penny's by accident. My mum kept my existence a secret to the hospital, in some ways she was embarrassed. I just thought I'd honour Penny's legacy by continuing to keep this from people."

"That's a bit soppy."

Marina laughed at Jac's ignorance, "I'm sure you'd like Emma to do the same."

Her phone buzzed in her hand, and for the first time in years, she felt a cold sensation of dread trickling over her as she read the message: it was from Frieda Petrenko.


	5. Chapter 5

The cold chill that crept over Marina Valentine resulted in her standing frozen on the spot, her heart thumping in her chest, she was acutely aware she was shaking. Trying to swallow, she realised her mouth was dry, and that it was evident she was panicking. Time passed as she read the message continuously, her laboured breathing being the only thing heard in the painful silence that had ensued in the room. Should she reply? Should she ignore it and pretend it never happened?

Questions rose in her mind, some harsher than others as she toyed on the spot over a message from someone, she used to be close to. Why the contact now? It had been years since she'd last seen Frieda, and although she thought about her daily, she'd kind of grown used to life without Frieda (and Penny) around. Seeing Frieda again would bring back too many painful memories, for both, and simply receiving a text message had reminded Marina of what she was running from.

"Bad news?"

Marina has completely forgotten she was still in a room with Jac. Time had passed by hazily. Had it been seconds or even minutes? Jac had her chin rested on her enclosed hands and leant on the desk calmly, patiently waiting for any response from the distressed young woman.

"I don't know," Marina croaked, aware that she was holding back tears. "It's just an old friend. Not much really."

Even as Jac nodded sceptically, it hit Marina. She was running from acknowledging the happiness in her childhood, but no matter how hard she tried, she never had found it since.

Two Weeks Later: AAU

Every single text message that came through, Marina ignored. She was being cowardly, and she acknowledged it, but the bitterness Marina still had towards Frieda due to an incident remained, despite their previously close relationship.

"Isn't that a bit weird, you know. The constant texts from whoever they are." Cam whispered, making sure Nurse Donna Jackson wouldn't hear their conversation and swoop down on them both like a motherly hawk.

"It's probably fine. But with Chloe and... Evan, well we're all a bit on edge," Cam continued, wringing his hands.

"Well, they haven't broken into my house yet," Marina laughed but catching Cam's scornful eye, she backed down. "I'm sorry Cam, I mean she just wants to say she's sorry. We only need to be concerned about Chloe now."

The previous evening, Evan Crowhurst had broken into Nicky, Cam and Chloe's flat and behaved in a threatening manner to all three of them. The police had been called and Evan had been escorted off the premises, but all three of them were remaining cautious.

Zav had just sidled in beside them, clutching some patient notes and eyeing the doors of the AAU suspiciously. He drummed his pen on the desk, tapping a tense rhythm and was deep in thought. The doors opened and in strode a tired looking Ric Griffin to the annoying beat of Zav's pen tapping accompanying his train of thought.

"Look, I don't need an audience," Ric spat at all three of them who had simultaneously gawped at him as he had entered the AAU. "However, Miss Valentine, if you'd like to observe me today, you will be my only welcome audience."

Zav spluttered and Cam cleared his throat as they both dashed off guiltily in different directions. Ric frowned at them both, and clasped his hands together waiting patiently for his two stupid sidekicks to go about their job.

"Mr Duval, he likes to watch over me like a babysitter," Ric scowled, his frown lines becoming protruded on his forehead. He looked tired, but rumour had it, Ric had been at Holby for as long as anyone could remember, with no intentions of leaving any time soon. "If you'd like, there is a patient who has been admitted a few minutes ago, he is yet to receive assessment from the incompetent Mr Duval, so I will do it for him."

Ric huffed as he strode over to a young man curled up in agony on the bed.

"Mr Bellamy, I am Mr Griffin, a consultant and clinical lead for AAU, and this is Miss Valentine, a capable volunteer at the hospital. I'd just like to run some observations on you."

Mr Bellamy awkwardly uncurled himself, a slow smirk creeping onto his face as he made eye contact with Marina upon showing his face for the first time, which Marina instantly recognised.

"Ian?"

"Valentine." He replied, his eyebrow delicately raised.

"You two know each other?" Ric interjected, looking between the two of them."

"Vaguely- "

"More than vaguely," Ian drawled, drumming his long pointy fingers onto the table suspended above his bed. Silently daring Marina to say more, he proceeded to turn his interest to Ric.

"We'd like to do some preliminary tests; I just need to feel your abdomen quickly. We're going to run some FBCs, and I'd like to do a liver function," Ric began, handing Marina the notes. "You see Miss Valentine, I need to look for areas in which upon pressing, the pain gets worse. I suspect it's appendicitis. But we'll run other blood tests to make sure. Miss Valentine, if you'd like, you could stay with Mr Bellamy and maybe be shown by Nurse Jackson how to administer pain relief, you might find it of interest."

"Very frank," Ian commented on Ric as Ric walked away, "Seems to know his stuff. Everyone knows who Ric Griffin is."

Marina nodded, avoiding eye contact with Ian.

"Anyway," Ian continued, straightening himself up on his pillows, "How's it been Valentine?"

"Fine," Marina replied shortly, not wanting to discuss the matters that were currently on her mind.

It seemed that just about anyone she had cleared herself of seemed to be worming themselves back into her life. Ian Bellamy was a fellow student with her during her time in A Levels, and he prided himself upon his immaculate revision notes that he'd make before lessons. For the two years, they'd been inseparable, alongside their joint friend Poppy, and the trio hadn't missed a moment together.

"Fine?" Ian queried doubtfully. "You sleep with me, fall out with Poppy because you both fancied the pants off me, plus I then hear from neither of you again. I wouldn't call that fine."

Pulling the hair away that covered her eyes and tucking it behind her ears, Marina avoided eye contact with Ian whilst he continued.

"We also forgot to mention your _family _situation."

He gazed at Marina sympathetically, a look she had not seen in a long while, and her heart burnt. Considering herself a strong woman, she didn't want to break down in front of him out of all people.

"Ian, I've made a terrible mistake."

_Frieda Petrenko's Flat: Nine Years Previously_

"This is soppy. I must wear a stupid dress and look all smart and fancy for a pathetic date. I'd much rather be at school than here, but here I am." Marina sulked at the doorway of Frieda Petrenko's kitchen, her black dress ruffled from her impromptu decision to do cartwheels on the living room floor. Glaring at the two women in front of her, she folded her arms and stood as defiantly as possible. Penny burst out laughing at the young girl's petulance.

"Look, I'm sure you'll look back on this fondly one day."

Marina shook her head, angry tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

"You could help Frieda cook if you're bored?" Penny offered, trying to divert Marina to Frieda.

Frieda snorted over the food that was sizzling in the frying pan, "Sure, the small gothic lady can come help if she so wishes."

Looking away from them both, she rolled her eyes. She hated kids, and the child talk she had to adopt in social situations, so she didn't upset the child. Marina wasn't so bad; she was feisty and incredibly stubborn; needless to mention her gothic demeanour. Despite being young, Marina was obsessed with all things gothic, she loved dark, proudly proclaiming to the children at the hospital creche that her dream was to be stuck in an elevator with people due to the excitement of the inevitable happening, such as it dropping, or never escaping. This prompted several of the kids refusing to use the lifts for the rest of the day, and Marina was swiftly dumped on the AAU staff.

"Anyway, what are you cooking, love heart cookies for your candlelit dinner?" Marina jeered, turning her nose up at Frieda. "Who decides to use candles when the lights are working just fine? Stupid if you ask me."

Laughing, she trailed out of the room and a few seconds later, the sound of the TV echoed through the flat.

"Why did I think this was a good idea?" Penny sighed. "She's completely against us."

"She'll come around," Frieda replied. "She's just jealous. She has to share attention now, maybe she won't be so spoilt."

"Anyway," Frieda continued, the pans crashing in the sink as she dumped them there, "We've had a few hot dates already, might as well have the child involved for one of them. It might be fun. She'll be entertaining if she continues to strop all evening."

"This is gross," Marina sighed, poking at her food later on in the evening, and staring scornfully at the candles upon the table. "The food and this." She gestured at the set up of the room. "We are not part of a romance movie yet."

Frieda snorted into her food whilst Penny looked hurt.

"You're right kid, let's have dinner in darkness instead. More fun" Frieda cackled with a glimmer in her eyes.

"No." Marina sulked. She continued to pick out her food throughout the meal and remained in a foul mood, but offered to clear the plates, in which she muttered it was due to her avoiding any 'disgusting snogging.'

A few hours later Marina, who was huddled in the corner reading a book whilst Frieda and Penny were romantically curled up on the sofa, sighed and closed her book before practically creeping across the room to them.

"I'm sorry," she said, hanging her head sadly. "You know. I just hate this. I hate all soppy candles. I hate not having attention. You'll both be so fixed on each other; you'll forget about me."

"That's not true," Penny exclaimed defensively.

"Why would we forget a fellow goth?" Frieda added smirking.

"I've just never seen Mum love someone so much," Marina whimpered. "I'm just scared that's all."

She twisted a lock of her hair around her finger as she toyed over whether she wanted to continue.

"But I'm cool with it, you two. And if you want, you can take me to school. I don't care what the other kids think, they can think what they want. I know twenty ways to kill someone with my bare hands."

"Twenty?" Penny looked mortified whilst Frieda looked impressed.

"I could show you now if you'd like."

_AAU Present Day_

"What have you done now?" Ian sighed, not sure whether he wanted to hear what Marina had to say for herself.

"Frieda, she tried to contact me the other day."

Marina waited for Ian's response. She'd spent so much time longing for contact from Frieda, only to go and avoid replying. It was cowardly, but as she'd previously decided, she just didn't want to respond as it'd remind her of happier days.

"I'm guessing you didn't reply," Ian said disheartened. "Marina, we discussed this."

Marina nodded. "I'm sorry, I can do it now if you want."

"It's not whether I want to Marina, it's whether you want to. You're clearly not ready. What is the pink appearance all about, pink hair, some questionable pink makeup, I highly imagine your clothes before you borrowed some scrubs were also pink? You're a goth at heart, why the disguise for?"

Ian looked hurt; he was speaking to her as though he was a parent. Something Marina hadn't heard in a long time. She suddenly was aware she was clasping his hand tightly and tried to loosen her grip.

"It was Frieda. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw Frieda. And it hurt."

She waited for his response, but they were rudely interrupted by Nurse Jackson.

Marina coughed nervously as Nurse Jackson swept over, warmly smiling at them both. Gesturing to Marina, she offered to let her observe what she was doing and promised next time that she might be able to do it herself, providing she was supervised.

"It should be no problem," Nurse Jackson grinned as she folded up her latex gloves, whisking Marina away from Ian's bedside. "Ric's ran some blood tests; he thinks it's appendicitis. Well the results from the FBCs suggest normal blood cell counts for white and red blood cells, he ran liver function and that's fine. But we would like to get him into surgery soon, to remove the appendix."

Donna seemed sympathetic towards Marina, almost as if she knew the reality of the situation.

"I hear you two were close," Donna deliberately asked whilst terribly acting casual by fake flicking through some paperwork on the desk.

"Yeah, very."

Raising her eyebrows, Donna continued trying to look occupied, but it was evident she was itching to offer opinion about something.

"But," she breathed heavily, "Don't go getting upset over men Marina, or women. If he doesn't like you back, don't kid yourself over it, and wind yourself up stupid. Leave him in the past where he belongs. It may not feel great to start with, but it will be fine in the end. Because, in all honesty, I think you're friends and nothing more, but this friendship can't really last can it? I read it in your face. It hurts you. But sometimes, there are people we can't cut off. No matter how hard it is to be near them, we know we'd hurt more and longer if we left them in the past. There's no harm in making contact a few years down the line with anyone, if it's the right thing for you."

Donna looked on concerned at Marina, but proud over the advice she'd just offered, unaware of the horrible regret Marina had suddenly gained.

After all, Donna did say that there was no harm of contacting someone again in the past. Slowly, Marina got out her phone, dialling a number she had not rang for years, but a number that she used to love hearing from so much.

Before she could continue, the whole ward was alerted by the sudden change in sound from the machines monitoring Ian. Doctors and nurses sprinted across the room towards him with crash trolleys, Marina and Donna quickly ran over too, with Marina grabbing Ian's patient files to pass over to Ric. Flicking through them, she stopped at the FBC results, especially the white blood cell count.

"Zav," she panted chucking him the notes. "We were told his white blood cell count was normal. But here, it's anything but normal. Ric's made an error. Ian's got an infection; his appendix has probably burst and I'm scared. I don't want him to die."

"What," Ric snapped angrily, snatching the notes from Zav. "You're right but how?"

Donna ushered Marina to one side and recommended it was safer if she observed Cameron for a while. Cameron nodded sympathetically, and quickly they headed over to a patient being wheeled in by the porters into AAU.

"Ashar Ghadri, 30-year-old male, caught in a hit and run and transferred up here. Trouble is, he can't speak English. ED did some digging, he can only speak his native language of Pakistan, moved here three months ago, so might be difficult communicating, but if anyone can speak Urdu?"

"I can," Marina interjected and began to talk to the patient.

"Urdu?" Cam questioned confused. "How do you know that language?"

Marina hesitated as she noticed a few awed staff members around her. This would be awkward explaining.


	6. Chapter 6

She never explained, she didn't have time. Donna Jackson swooped in and demanded Marina go home because clearly seeing Iain here was 'upsetting' her greatly, although this wasn't necessarily the case. But going home was better than awkwardly explaining some past ventures to Cameron Dunn, so she slipped away back to the flat they shared alongside Chloe Godard and Nicky McKendrick in which both Nicky and Chloe were scheduled on the night shift. Picking up the phone, she dialled Ollie's number, just in case he was available…

"Marina?" Ollie sounded instantly worried, most probably because he'd have to listen to an issue which he was too cowardly to sort out.

"I just need to run something by you. A man turned up at AAU today, and he could only speak Urdu, and I was just not thinking, and basically spoke the language to him fluently, and now they want to know where I learnt it from."

"Just say you learnt it from a teacher," Ollie methodised, "you took lessons out of curiosity."

"But detective Naylor will work it out. Plus, Ian Bellamy is on the ward as a patient."

Ollie went painfully silent, clearly, he was disapproving.

"Not him, anything but him. He's complete trash. He dragged your name through dirt, and you still have feelings for him? You're naïve and stupid, come on, you're doing a Penny and chasing after men who aren't right for you. He's cruel and enjoys tormenting you. Just let the hospital treat him and leave him where he belongs."

The words hurt in Marina's mind, but they hit close to home, Ollie was right, after all she had focusing on trying to gain the skills for medical school, she didn't need any romantic distractions.

A storm began to brew during the course of the night, and by the morning, rain lashed against the windows and wind rattled the window panes. The sound of Marina's phone rang through the flat at 5am that morning, and begrudgingly, she answered it, and was greeted with the irritatingly cheery voice of Sue Buchanan, also known as 'Scary Sue.'

"Hi Marina my lovely," she breathed shakily into the phone. "I've been told to tell you, Ian's deteriorating. The infection's spread, we don't know whether he's going to make it. If you want to pop in and be with your boyfriend, then now might be the time."

"He's not my boyfriend," corrected Marina uncomfortably. "But sure, I'll come into see him."

It was probably too unsafe to battle through the wind and rain to reach the hospital, but Marina battled nevertheless, her bright pink hair plastered to her face by the time she reached the reception. Taking off her hood, she panted and stared up at the hospital she'd came to love that loomed above her. She saw the flickering lights on Darwin Ward, and savoured the moment with a feeling of ambition, she was going to be a doctor, she was sure of it. As the rain continued to plaster her face, she noticed a man standing beside her, she didn't mean to, but he reminded her of a cowboy by the hat he was wearing.

"Terrible weather," he observed quietly.

"Indeed," Marina replied, she could swear she recognised the man yet before she could ask him, he became side tracked by an arriving ambulance.

Marina left him outside, and walked relieved into the warmth of the hospital; flashing her ID at the new receptionist in a hurry, hoping she could get to AAU as quickly as possible. As the lift doors opened, she nearly collided with Jac Naylor, who was looking extremely agitated.

"Marina?" She asked, confused at to what the young woman was doing at the hospital in the middle of the storm.

"My friend, he's deteriorating."

The two women acknowledged each other before Jac hurried out into the rain; pulling up her hood as she did so.

Upon arriving at AAU, Marina was swarmed by Dom Copeland (who was covering on AAU due to the lack of doctors able to make it in) and Scary Sue.

"It's not good," Sue screeched, overdramatising the situation.

"He's not responding to his treatment as well as we'd have liked," Dom sighed, tip toeing around the word 'death,' "We've called his parents and their battling to make it in, but it's looking bleak. I'm sorry."  
Marina nodded in appreciation, and turned to look at the ward; noticing that Ashar Ghadri was still on the ward, and therefore to distract herself from the impending doom, she wandered over to his bed to see how he was.

"Mr Ghadri," she nodded, speaking in his native tongue. "How's it going?"

"It was a hernia," he croaked back, tired but grinning through the pain. "I don't know what it is, but they operated on me, but their main focus is the boy over there, he's dying."

Ashar gestured over to Ian's bed where a medical team were gathered.

"Anyway, how come you can speak my language?" He asked, propping himself up on his pillows, intrigued to hear more. "You are very talented at it."

"Long story," Marina laughed, debating whether she could be bothered to tell him, but he seemed curious, and he clearly had the time.

_Holby City Hospital, 4 years previously:_

Elliot Hope was in shock for multiple reasons. Not only had Frieda Petrenko, a former colleague of his been admitted to hospital with a multi resistant strain of tuberculosis, she came accompanied by an old love interest of his, Brigitte Nye. He took deep gulps of air as he tried to work out what he was going to do, or even say to her.

"Mr Hope?" A voice asked tentatively behind him.

Elliot turned to face a teenage girl, her long ebony hair arranged in space buns, her arms rested on her hips

"You are Mr Hope, right?"

"Yes," Elliot stammered, confused as to who she was. "What do you want?"

The girl laughed coldly, her eyes glinting manically in the cold air. "I want nothing. Just for you to do your job."

"That's what I'm doing?"

"Save her Mr Hope, please." She stared at him with a new fear in her eyes. "I will be alone if not."

Suddenly, memories came flooding back to Elliot, he remembered this girl from a few years previously, the 'secret' daughter of late Penny Valentine.

"Marina?" He barely recognised her; she'd matured her since her days of scaring off other children in the creche, and her original red hair was long gone. She'd acquired a nose piercing, and a rather rude tattoo on her arm considering she was underage. "No longer scaring children at the hospital?"

"No," she laughed, acknowledging Elliot's comment. "Scaring children in Pakistan instead."

"You went to Pakistan?"

"Yeah," Marina rolled her eyes at Elliot, as though that was obvious. "Frieda said I could come with her. It was cool. I got to see some of the action, the things doctors do over there. It's so different Mr Hope, I love it."

"Love is a strong word," Elliot commented doubtfully.

"All went well, until she got tuberculosis. Treating other patients with it, and then she went and got it. I would go as far as calling her an idiot. But you can save her, right?"

She looked at him pleadingly, she'd invested so much hope in Elliot, and he didn't have the heart to tell her he feared the worst.

"I'll do everything I can Marina."

_AAU, Present Day_

"I went to a school out there for a while," Marina added to Ashar. "It was cool, but very different. I don't really know whether I learnt anything. I was too interested in the medicine Frieda and Brigitte were doing. It was fascinating."

"You've lived a good life," Ashar concluded. "You've seen and done so much. I want to do medicine too, but I've done very little compared to you."

"Gap year?" Marina suggested to Ashar. "Gain experience then apply. That's what I did also, plus you'll be a but mature than other medicine students. It might help."

Nodding, Ashar considered Marina's idea, "I might do that, thanks."

A hand rested itself on Marina's shoulder, it was Donna looking grim. They locked eyes for a moment, and Donna's watering eyes suggested that it was bad news.

"His parents are stuck, flood water in the village they live in. I don't think they're going to make it."

"Don't look at me," spat Marina bitterly, "I don't want to sit and clutch his hand until the end."

Donna looked sternly at Marina. Giving in, Marina rolled her eyes and reluctantly trudged after Donna to a dying Ian's bedside.

"What do I say?" She asked Donna awkwardly. "Not in the empathetic mood particularly today."

"You don't need to say anything Marina, just be there. He'll appreciate it."

Donna sat as calmly as possible at a chair one side of the bed and Marina in a chair at the other; together they both took hold of a hand and let their warmth seep into his dying body. They held his hands until he died.

The stagger to Darwin ward was long and painful. She was initially calm, but with each step, the confusion grew worse, and soon her mind was blurred by the time she burst onto Darwin.

"Marina?" Nicky McKendrick asked in shock as she stared into the lifeless eyes of her grieving flatmate. Fortunately, she caught her as she fell; sobbing in Nicky's arms. They sat for a few minutes, the sobs of Marina filling Darwin ward whilst Nicky was silent and sympathetic.

"What's all the drama?" A voice croaked from a nearby hospital bed.

"Dr McKendrick will be with you in a second," the tired voice of Fletch replied.

"So much drama still in Holby," the croaky voice mused. "Which doctor has buckled under the pressure this time?"

"Faye, please," the soft voice of Joseph Byrne could be heard by her bedside.

"Faye?" Marina mumbled, still clutching onto Nicky.

Nicky slowly rose, guiding Marina to a standing position. Marina trembled as she squinted through Darwin Ward, trying to distinguish the familiar owner of the voice she had just heard. "Where's Faye?"  
"Marina, you should probably just go and sit in the staffroom, you're clearly not fit to work," Nicky instructed, but flapped her arms in infuriation as Marina shakily made her way into the separate room that Faye Morton was situated in.

"Faye?"

"Do I know you?" Faye asked suspiciously, one eyebrow raised. Marina couldn't tell whether Faye was being sarcastic or genuine. Joseph coughed as he came to the realisation.

"Marina," he wobbled, slightly unsure how to introduce himself in the grave situation. "Faye you remember Marina don't you?"

"What as in baby Valentine?" Faye smirked, meeting Joseph's gaze. She turned to marina, her face softening. "Is it really you?"

"Well not going to lie, impersonating Marina would be pretty awful," Marina replied drily. "So yes, it is really me. What are you doing here Faye?"

"I was an alcoholic." Faye replied slowly, she was smirking rather unnervingly. "I need a heart transplant."

Joseph nodded anxiously, looking at his watch as he did so. The arrival of the heart to Darwin was taking longer than expected, and Joseph was beginning to fear that the heart would never arrive at all. Tapping his foot impatiently, he tried to preoccupy himself.

"What have you been doing with yourself Marina?"

"Not much really. Trying to gain experience in hospitals, grieving constantly, sat some exams. It's been a bit dull really."

"I'm sorry, do you guys know each other," butted in Fletch, disappointed that he was being kept out of the loop.

"We used to work at the hospital with Marina's mum," said Joseph. "Faye was a nurse, and I was here on Darwin."

Fletch acknowledged the information and stood awkwardly. He started at the sound of commotion coming from outside in the commotion. An infuriated Jac was striding away from a young distressed woman.

"Youths," Jac spat as she stormed to Faye's bedside. "Following me around like puppies."

"Why what on earth is the matter now?" asked Fletch dumbfounded.

Jac gestured furiously towards the young woman who stood persistently outside the door. Her nostrils were flared and her small beady eyes were not losing their cold stare from Marina's face. Fletch coughed awkwardly as he looked from the young woman to Marina.

"Seems like this isn't the only school like reunion we're dealing with today…"

Jess Rowe was furious. Tapping her foot impatiently, she silently dared her arch enemy, Marina Valentine, to say something, but was disappointed as the silence still ensued. She used to mildly dislike the woman, but now it was pure jealousy. Eyeing Marina, she remained stood in her position, praying that Marina would eventually give in and talk to her. She did. Airily, Marina swept past Jess and coldly beckoned her to follow whilst barely acknowledging her; she flicked her long pink ponytail over her shoulder as a sudden air of arrogance hit her. Kicking open the door to the relatives' room, she gestured at Jess to enter, and cocked her head to one side as she watched the teary young woman try to formulate a sentence. She felt sorry for Jess, the poor girl had been close friends with Ian, and it had clearly upset her. However, the girl seemed hostile, almost angry at something.

"I wanted to be there," she howled, tears streaming down her face, "I wanted to be with him when he died. Not you, it was never meant to be you."

Taken aback by the sudden attack, Marina laughed coldly. Jess was unsure whether it was Marina's grief or her icy demeanour which was behaving like this towards herself, but it unnerved her.

"I didn't choose to," Marina explained. "But the poor sod had no one else to hold his poor hand, I took sympathy on him."

"But I'm his partner, that's my responsibility," Jess squeaked, dwarfed by how small she was in comparison to Marina. "That's not yours."

Marina's heart sunk horribly as she stood rooted to the spot, her mouth horribly dry. Attempting to play off her watering eyes as preceding a sneeze, she tried to formulate a sentence that didn't reveal how upset she was.

"As a volunteer at this hospital, it was my responsibility," Marina retorted, her voice wobbling, and she frantically tried to steady it. "I'm sorry you couldn't be there Jess, I really am."

Marina swept out of the room, rubbing her welling eyes. She didn't want to go back and see Faye and Joseph. Their presence reminded her of Penny; if she went back to AAU, she'd be reminded of Ian's death. She ran out into the cold night air, the rain lashing against her bare skin and scrubs, and she slumped herself onto the nearest bench and screamed, hoping that the storm would mask it out.

Hours passed, shivering, Marina remained outside, her mind numb. She barely noticed when another person sat beside her, but slowly she noticed they too, were crying. The storm had stopped, and a rainbow was present over the hospital. Tiredly, she turned to the person next to her- it was Jac. Jac's eyes were red and blotchy, she had clearly been crying for hours.

"He's married to her still," Jac spat bitterly, tears still streaming down her swollen cheeks, her nose dripping.

Marina shakily swept her wet hair out of her eyes, and composed herself for Jac, it wouldn't help if they were both upset.

"Joseph and Faye are still married?" Marina asked, slightly surprised. Last time she'd heard, they were filing for divorce, and Joseph had been married to someone else. "I'm sorry to hear that Jac."

"I told him never to come back," Jac sobbed. "I wish if it could have been me married to him, not her."

Marina sympathised with Jac. "It's good to distance yourself from him."

"Is it?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry for your loss."

Marina paused, "I'm not. It's not my loss. It doesn't matter anymore."

She heaved herself of the bench with a new sense of hope for the future, she was finally free from this horrible friendship. Even though she'd mourn him, he was finally free. As she walked away from Jac, she resolved that she'd answer Frieda's text, after all what harm could it do?

However, her trail of thought was interrupted by a hysterical Jess diving in front of her.

"I'm going to tell everyone," Jess spat bitterly, grinning manically. "I'm going to tell everyone who you are and your dirty little secret."


	7. Chapter 7

7

It was a quiet Tuesday morning, the kettle hissed in the corner and its steam rose out of the lid in delicate pillows. No one else was up yet, and as usual, Marina had crashed on the sofa overnight, which wasn't the most comfortable place to sleep, but it was better than other places she had stayed recently. Furthermore, Chloe had kindly offered her some clean sheets on her bed, which she could sleep in whilst Chloe was away for a few days at Cam's country cottage, but Marina refused. There was no point, she hadn't made a bed in years, and couldn't be bothered to sleep in another bed for a few nights that was far comfier than the sofa, only for her to be sent back to it upon Chloe's return.

There was a solemn atmosphere in the flat currently; Cam was still waiting any news on his mum, Bernie Wolfe, who was still missing in action following an explosion, and his quiet and depressive nature had cast shadows on Nicky and Marina's mood also. One of the flat doors creaked, and Nicky slouched into the kitchen, her pink fluffy slippers sliding on the laminated floor.

"Morning," she yawned, deciding it was an idea to use the water in the kettle which had been boiled. "Quieter without Chloe, isn't it?"

Marina nodded in agreement. Nicky was clearly trying to make conversation under the strained flat atmosphere.

"Ooh, I was just going to ask," she stammered nervously, debating whether to continue her sentence, "Cam said that a few weeks back, you spoke fluently to a patient in another language. I can't remember the name of it though."

"Isn't it incredible that I can speak another language?" Marina replied sarcastically, trying to wind up Nicky. "Didn't realise speaking another language would make me the subject of hospital gossip."

"But how did you learn it?" Nicky asked enthusiastically. She had must made herself a coffee, and had sat down on the sofa next to Marina, clutching her mug enthusiastically. "Look, you can tell me anything."

"You want to hear about Pakistan?" Marina started, whilst Nicky's eyes widened in excitement. Unfortunately, Marina couldn't understand why Nicky was finding this so exciting, but she enjoyed the attention.

_Ukraine, years previously_

Marina had moved out to Ukraine with Frieda almost immediately after she stormed out of the hospital amid a rift between Serena Campbell and Ric Griffin. Since Frieda was also technically her 'mum' in some formats, she trailed Frieda around like a lost puppy, even agreeing to accompany her to Ukraine. Although she was left in the house alone a lot, she didn't mind, and when she wasn't ploughing on with her schoolwork, she would occupy herself by usually by reading some of Frieda's medical journals. Frieda had left her laptop open for Marina to flick through articles of her interest, and she plugged her earphones into some heavy metal music before scrolling through some articles. She found an interesting article surrounding Li Fraumeni syndrome, and decided she'd spend her Saturday morning reading up on it. However, she was side tracked by an email flashing across the bottom of the screen. Stopping, she drummed her spindly fingers with their black nail polish onto the desk, she usually could ignore emails, but this one took her interest. She sipped her black coffee delicately, and hovered the mouse above the email, debating whether to click on it.

RE: Medics wanted in Pakistan

Marina's heart had sunk for some reason, she felt as though she knew what she'd see upon opening the email. Opening it, her eyes darted across the screen quickly, and she sighed tiredly as she read the email, trying to keep herself awake. Frieda had applied to a job in Pakistan, working as a medic and the email was confirming her success after her successful interview. Marina felt sick, she didn't know Frieda was considering leaving the country, and worst of all, she flied out next Monday meaning it'd be a quick move. That was if Marina was actually coming with her. Frieda could be very isolated at times, and after all, why would she want her life to be held back by a teenager?

She heard the key in the door, and slamming the laptop lid down, she pulled out a book from the shelf and sat guiltily on the sofa. Throwing her keys on the table, Frieda sat elegantly down on the sofa next to Marina and peered curiously over her shoulder at what she was reading.

"Trying to read a Ukrainian book?" She asked seriously, raising her eyebrow in amusement. "How's it going."

"Alright" Marina responded, trying to act as though she understood it all properly. "I understand it quite well."

Frieda nodded impressed, and taking the book off Marina, flicked through the page. "What words do you not understand?"

Marina tried to think quickly, there were a few she didn't understand still, but she hadn't properly read the page. She was getting closer to fluency. "Just a few here and there, I'm getting good now at it, might have to learn a new language after this, what's the language of Pakistan by the way? I now apparently also need to learn that."

She'd spat the last bit out bitterly, and suddenly realised what she'd said and clapped her hand to her mouth.

"I'm so sorry" she whispered apologetically. She met eyes with Frieda, and for once, her emotionless eyes were lit up with some form of hurt, Marina had hit a nerve.

"You read my emails?" Frieda folded her arms tensely. "I was going to tell you."

"Were you though?"

The atmosphere had changed, Marina was angry and hurt, she could feel the tears prickling in he eyes and threatening to spill. Every time she thought she'd finally built some sort of positive relationship with Frieda, it would crumble in some format, usually due to Frieda going cold and distant occasionally.

"It was going to be a surprise" Frieda retorted. Marina shifted herself awkwardly on the sofa, it would have been better if she'd have kept quiet, but once again, she'd filled her mind with such negative thoughts and convinced herself that Frieda didn't like her.

"We fly out Monday," Frieda continued. "That's if you want to come."

She raised her eyebrows disapprovingly at Marina, and Marina nodded timidly in response. Of course, she wanted to come, she at least needed someone...

_Holby City Hospital, Present Day_

Marina had underestimated how long it would take to tell Nicky about Pakistan. Nicky enjoyed listening to the medical cases Marina presented her with, it gave them something positive to talk about in the midst of all the tragedies of their flat, and they spent many hours on various days talking.

Today was Ian's funeral. Some of the AAU doctors were turning up for it out of respect. It'd took Marina some convincing, but she was also going, after all, they were friends... once.

"You shouldn't be in." Of course, Serena would say that, she said that to Cam multiple times, but he blatantly refused to even listen to her.

"He meant nothing to me,"

Serena sighed with exasperation, "If you say so."

She trailed off, leaving Marina alone with a patient that happened to be next to her. For a minute she paused, and took in the ward around her, the people, sights and smells. She wanted this so bad, to be a doctor. But she didn't think she was good enough, or that she was strong enough to do it. Penny and Ollie were incredibly talented doctors, yet she remembered their tears and thee multiple days Penny would come home and claim she couldn't go on anymore. She remembered their chapped hands, their sore feet, their long hours and the occasional desire to quit. She hadn't even started, but there was a new panic arising within her, what if she didn't actually want the profession, she was mainly doing it to make other people proud. But those people either died, or found pastures new. Even her stupid pink hair was an attempt to impress Ian, she hated pink. After all, she was a goth at heart, whether she liked it or not; she was no longer going to repress things she liked due to painful memories, she had to live in the moment- and not the past.

Suddenly, with a new motivation, she turned to the patient and silently resolved to herself: she was going to be a doctor, but the doctor she wanted to be, and very different from the Valentines. After all, she needed to individualise herself; today would be the last day she mentioned either of their names professionally… or Frieda's. Marina suddenly realised she was taken aback by the patient, a young mother sat in a hospital bad, solemnly rocking her new-born. It didn't take a genius to work out what was wrong, and as Cameron headed over to propose a diagnosis, he exchanged a nervous glance with Marina.

"They're not saying what's wrong with her…" stammered the young woman, her eyes glistening with panic. Her daughter's entire chest was severely blistered, and so were various other regions of her body.

"Why don't you say it…" Cam muttered to Marina. "You could do with practise in giving… not so great news."

"Not so great," Marina whispered back exasperated, "She's probably going to die."

Coughing, Marina tried to compose herself, this was the first time of many that she'd have to do this, and she hoped that eventually it'd get easier, but judging by the fear on Cam's face- probably not.

"You see, Melanie appears to have severe blistering on her skin. However, we're not just worried about her blistering externally- "

"You mean blistering inside as well?"

"Yes. We think its junctional epidermolysis bullosa. It's basically genetically inherited, it might be on her father's side she got it from… And I'm afraid, it's not got the most positive prognosis. There's usually, an 87% chance of mortality within the first year…"

Marina trailed off , it hurt as she saw the woman's face fall, and she began to cry. Cam wasn't very good at comforting patients, so stood there awkwardly whilst Marina tried to comfort the girl's mother.

"Jade," Marina said softly, reading the name off the patient notes left strewn across the table beside her. "It is going to be hard, but at least Melanie has all the love she needs right now. That is the most important thing."

Jade snivelled through her tears, and nodded before tentatively taking a tissue from Marina. Marina nodded at Jade, and turned to face Cam.

"Leave them for a while," he muttered.

They both trailed over to the main desk, and slumped exhausted into the chairs.

"It's sad isn't it," Marina contemplated, twiddling a pen between her fingers. "Jade clearly loves her kid, and they're probably going to get torn apart."

Marina silently remembered her own parental circumstances. "No mother should lose a child. Or a child losing a mother so young."

She turned, her throat sore from resisting the urge to cry for Jade and Melanie. "It makes you realise how cruel the world is – this job. You just have to cherish family members for what they are, and when you have them, because you never know…"

She lifted her head so her gaze met Cam's, and he acknowledged what she was saying.

_Hours Later: Nicky, Cam, Chloe and Marina's Flat:_

Grinning, Marina placed a towel round her shoulders, and Nicky reluctantly slid the plastic gloves onto her hand whilst Marina fumbled with a bottle of black hair dye.

"Thought we'd gotten rid of the goth in our flat," Nicky sighed teasingly, as she took hold of the dye.

Marina smirked, "my hair used to be this colour years ago."

She laughed at Nicky's dumbfounded face.

"Seriously!" Marina continued, amused at Nicky's badly concealed shock. "I guess I'm going to have to drag out some photos for you later."

Nicky shook her head, "You have enough life story to compose at least a trilogy."

They both laughed as Marina began to massage the dye through Marina's hair…

_St John's Church - Holby:_

Serena Campbell, Donna Jackson, Xavier Duval, Cameron Dun and Max McGerry stood awkwardly outside the church as they represented the hospital at Ian Bellamy's funeral. It was painfully awkward, they all decided to go as they felt guilty that he'd died so young, and that he was a bit more than a patient to Marina.

"No sign of Valentine," Serena whispered to Donna.

Donna looked nervously around, and nodded in agreement. She met eyes with Jess, Ian's girlfriend, and tried to acknowledge her, but got met with the ice-cold stare in response.

"Cheerful girl," Donna muttered bitterly to her colleagues around her. "Oh no, she's approaching us. Hope she didn't hear what I just said."

"Nurse Jackson?" Jess chimed, far too cheerfully. "You were one of the many amazing staff that looked after Ian in his final hours…"

Jess trailed off; she was clearly angling at something. "You were all great, apart from that Valentine woman, so self-centred, she cannot even spot when she needs to leave other people's business. It's her fault."

"How's it her fault?" Asked Cam, a bit too bitterly.

"Oh, she's just the sort of person that lies all the time. To 'protect' people she claims. That's utter nonsense, she is just constantly living in a web of her own spun lies."

"How exactly?" Asked Serena accusingly.

Jess raised her eyebrows at them, enjoying the attention. "Have you ever tried mentioning the word Frieda to her? The way she shudders, it's hilarious."

"And, maybe they've got their differences?" Donna added defensively.

"Differences?" Snorted Jess. "Well yes, you could say that. After all, Frieda and Penny were dating at the time of Penny's death. But it gets better than that… If you look at Marina's record, she's got Frieda's number down as her next of kin, and not Ollie's…"

"What?" Spluttered Serena, confused.

"Why?" Donna asked.

"You see, Frieda's actually Marina's moth-"

"Mother via adoption," a voice hissed behind Jess. It was Marina Valentine, her new glossy black hair sleeking down her shoulders. She had decided to turn up to Ian's funeral after all. Jess turned, clearly patronised by Marina's presence and was met by an icy stare. Cam snorted a little at the comical scene, Marina was significantly taller than Jess, and dominated her.

"Anyway, shall I continue?" Marina said with fake enthusiasm. "Yes, maybe I have been lying yet again about my family circumstances. On Valentine's day, two months before Penny died, she decided to introduce another parental figure in my life. Frieda adopted me, and became another mum to me, and after Penny's death, my only mum… I didn't want to tell you as it would come as a big shock to some. And I wanted you all to respect Frieda still, since it is very evident that we haven't exactly been on good terms recently…"


End file.
